I came across this today and was inspired to share my thoughts.
I think one of the greatest pleasure of having children is being able to see the world through innocent eyes. As we grow older we lose our innocence, our positivity, and our ignorance that the world is full of good, happiness and sunshine. Thankfully, this often dark and cruel world is full of beautiful children who’s worlds are still full of sunshine and smiles.
I try to remember this innocence when it comes to parenting my own children. They are like sponges that soak up every word that leaves my mouth, whether good or bad. My words can have a lasting impact on them and affect their life in ways I can’t even imagine.
We are all blessed to have brains that remember moments, events, people and all those special times in our lives. However, our brains also remember the heartaches, the failures, and words that were spoken that can never be taken back. We carry these phrases, the sentences and the words with us throughout our life trying to overcome them, delete them, or prove them wrong. Can we ever truly erase them? Can we ever really live our life without the fear of hearing those words again? Do we make our life choices unconsciously aware that previous hurtful words are the force behind our decisions? I’ve yet to find the answer to these questions. I don’t think you ever forget those words that cut you to the core of your being and leave everlasting scars. Forgiveness can come and be reassuring but the mind, the spirit, and the heart never forget. There is a saying, “time heals all wounds.” Time can’t heal scars. It can only act as a makeup covering it up, disguising it from the rest of the world, or making it blend in with it’s surroundings….but it’s always there. It can always be felt when your hand is run across it, there is always a raised bump or a silky texture that can’t be ignored. They are reminders of days when we let people down, when we no longer were inoccent and when our sunshines got dimmer and the thunderstorms rolled stronger. They remind us of hopes and dreams we once had that we were told would never come true, and lives we wanted to live that would only dissapoint.
As parents we will always say things we regret. We will always have moments of anger when our emotions will speak before our head has a chance to think. I can only hope that my words never leave an everlasting scar on my child. I never want my sons to live their life caged to past hurts that I can never take back or fix. I want to fill their world with hopes and dreams and never ending sunshine. I want to share in their triumphs and hold them in their failures. My children will fail at things in life, they will make mistakes, and they will make decisions that I wouldn’t choose for them. But they will be no different than their mom who has also failed at many things, made mistakes and unwise decisions. I would not change this for myself or for them. We grow from our mistakes, we learn from our decisions and we become who we are because of how we live our lives. I will teach my boys to live with no regrets and take each moment as it comes and become a better person. Things always happen for a reason and I hope I can always remember that before I say something that will darken my sons’ spirit and belief that the world is perfect.
Wishing you all calm words, sunshiney days, and big dreams……