Now that I have re-entered the work force I am learning how to balance out family time with work demands. For some reason working 43 hours a week for free, having nights full of homework and dedicating weekends to school work was easier than now getting paid to work 40 hours a week with no homework. Confusing right?
I don’t know if it’s the reality of the situation or the shock of ‘this is officially my life,’ or what….but I’ve been a little anxious lately which is a NEW feeling for me. I feel a lot of things but anxiety is very rare. The reality of not having an ending to this has hit home. Yes, a paycheck is going to be nice(whenever I see one) but before I always had a countdown. On the days when the boys were sad, or when I could barely keep my eyes open, I could say “just 4 more weeks until mommy gets a break.” Now, there is no break or ending. I’m stuck until retirement!! EEK
So faced with this I am trying to figure out how I can best utilize the time I do have outside of work. I’ve been trying to carve out time for myself each night to update this blog and fit in some exercise. So far it’s working but I feel guilt rearing her ugly head whenever I am doing something for myself and neglecting my husband or kiddos. Obviously, I am not neglecting anyone but Miss Guilty doesn’t seem to know the difference. My weekend was ruined because I dreaded Monday so much and all I could focus on was how little time I had. Instead of relishing in the time off I was so concerned about another work week I couldn’t enjoy it. This is unacceptable!
Here is what I’ve decided:
The world will not fall apart if I choose an hour of ‘ME’ time over wrestling on the floor.
Work will not make me happy 100% of the time, but it provides a place for me to use my talents and a springboard to make a difference.
Missing my family is actually good for our relationship. Sometimes we take advantage of people when we see them all the time.
A paycheck is a paycheck and benefits are worth the suffering.
Rome wasn’t built in a day and my life will not crumble in a day.
I only have one life…..I’m gonna spend it with less worry, more laughter and trust that I’m doing the right thing for my marriage and my babies.
Time is better spent with those I love than worrying about the time away from them.
Hoping you all learn to balance on the slippery teeter-totter of life……